June 2022 - Compassion Group Notes

Seeking Commonality Across Diversity

Listen to a song on YouTube called “The Birthday Party” by Peter Mayer, a singer and songwriter from Stillwater, Minnesota. The song is so appropriate as we embark on deeply studying sacred texts from all traditions in our groups. Music is the universal language of the soul, and how wonderful when the music and words speak guiding principles for our lives - all lives, from all traditions.

Lyrics for The Birthday Party by Peter Mayer

I saw the Buddha open up his eyes 

One Sunday morning 

Say he’s invited to a party for Christ

And he must be going

 He heaved himself up with a groan, standing slowly 

Came down those steps of stone, and asked me 

Where to catch the next train to Jerusalem  

In India he sang with Hindus as they prayed 

By the Ganges when the dawn came 

Near Arabia, he saw Mohammed on the train 

And asked if he would join him 

Passing those teeming towns, they talked for hours 

All about the truth and how it’s discovered 

Trading bits of news and stories from these thousand years  

Saying great idea, this party for Jesus 

Then Mohammed said hey Buddha, it’s great to see ya  

Finding the place with the help of Abraham 

Waving from the doorway 

They greeted faces from a thousand holy lands 

Present day and all ages (always) 

Everybody talking, laughing, fiercely debating 

Saying how desperately the world is changing 

Then somebody lit the two-thousand candles  

And they all toasted Jesus, born in a stable 

Then Jesus said hey, let’s not be such strangers

Recommended Movie

In the same vein watch this delightful movie: Tango Shalom

Wikipedia summary: Tango Shalom is a 2021 American dance comedy film directed by Gabriel Bologna and starring Jos Laniado, Judi Beecher, Renée Taylor, Lainie Kazan and Karina Smirnoff. It was produced by Joel Zwick who directed My Big Fat Greek Wedding. The film premiered at the 2021 Brooklyn Film Festival. The film was screened locally at the 31st Annual San Diego International Jewish Film Festival. and at Sedona Film Festival.Internationally, the film won the 2021 Artisan Festival International World Peace Initiative for Best World Peace and Tolerance Narrative Feature Film Award during the Cannes Film Festival, as well as both New Delhi and Jaipur International Film Festival awards.

Recommended Book

Trauma and Beyond - The Mystery of Transformation - by Ursula Wirtz

Quotes from the book:

“The abused child has no choice but to depend on his or her caregivers. So in order to ensure that they will continue to be present and available, he or she takes their guilt upon himself or herself—much as Christ archetypally took upon himself the sins of the world and died in its stead. Abused children willingly take on the role of scapegoat and sacrifice themselves and their developmental potential in the interests of survival.”

“I consider love to be the matrix for this transformation, which calls new being into existence. Love has the power to reawaken and bring to the fire what has been entombed or distorted by traumatic forces or has retreated out of defensiveness and self-protection. Without love and compassion for the fragility of human identity in the face of death and the reality of evil, the madness found in these barren spaces of the soul might not be meaningfully encountered. For the stripping away of the constricting cocoon of traumatic fixations and the untangling of what has become distorted and convoluted during painful traumatization, love is needed.”

“Trauma research has shown that what is primarily responsible for the consequences of trauma ... is ... the meaning that the victim ascribes to it in the context of his or her entire life.”

“Survivors who have mastered their trauma often exhibit a special capacity for love, an embodied concern for others, a deep kindness and caring for humanity as a whole.”

“I Feel Things Very Deeply” - Finding our Commonality

Everyone feels things very deeply until they are taught to repress, deny and minimize the experience of feeling. This statement is often used to both elevate one as especially empathic, or something…. Consider how you have said this and what it means. Does it mean special, or both special and devalued at the same time? Who told you this? How do you evaluate the statement - as something good, or something bad? How does this confuse you? Like everyone, you feel deeply - that’s all.

On the other hand, when children are expressing their deep and intense feelings, they are shamed and devalued by being told things like, “You are being oversensitive,” “You take yourself too seriously,” and any number of other putdowns, designed to make the child unaware of their deep feelings that are so uncomfortable for the adults in their lives.

Were you elevated or devalued for having feelings? What are all the nuances around this in your socialization? Can you write a paragraph or poem about the confusion about feelings being “good” or “bad”?

“Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. Those who are at times described as being a 'hot mess' or having 'too many issues' are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.” ~Anthon St. Maarten

Relationship to External Authority - an Inner Dynamic

For More … Read Here

Is your ego on a leash and your Soul in charge? Or do you have a sometimes obedient and sometimes rebellious ego that still is ruled by fear, shame and anger? Who is in charge?