Compassion Group Notes - December 2023

Listen for all the layers, colors, textures, and to what is not said, and yet said.

Reflective Listening - Judge or Join?

As you listen to others, are you truly listening to them or are you only judging what they say, or joining with what they say? Distancing or becoming enmeshed? Creating distance, or over-identifying?

If I say, “I am so tired.” Do you say, “Me too!” (joining)

or do you say, “Well maybe you could cut some things out of your schedule".” (judging and offering unsolicited advice - control from judgement)

Either of these options indicates a lack of listening and is merely the defense of projection because you were triggered into unaware anxiety by their statement and you offer your usual inner solution (sympathy and self pity for yourself, or control and judgment of yourself). In both scenarios you have not heard what the other person said at all. You have shown no interest and have not tried to understand or know their situation and experience in any way.

Consider how this is a habitual way of reacting to others as a daily practice of self observation, self-reflection and see if you can bring awareness (your True Self) to the conversation.

All that the apparently separate self needs to do to recognise its own essential nature and thus access its inherent peace and happiness is to recognise that its essence of pure awareness is not conditioned or limited by objective experience.

~ Rupert Spira

“A human being has so many skins inside, covering the depths of the heart. We know so many things, but we don't know ourselves! Why, thirty or forty skins or hides, as thick and hard as an ox's or bear's, cover the soul. Go into your own ground and learn to know yourself there.” ~Meister Eckhart

Experience and form, come and go. (Wave)

You do not. (Ocean)

The Goal of Therapy

The goal of therapy is not to get rid of anything, judge any thing, control anything, or change anything. The goal of therapy is awareness of the inner relationship you have to every age and aspect (thought/feeling/need/behavior) of your being that is hateful, destructive, mean, shaming, judgmental and controlling. When you actually SEE your inner relationship and how you were taught to relate to yourself, you will no longer desire such a relationship and it will automatically and naturally change. So, the goal of therapy is for you to realize you are consciousness and to SEE and hear what is going on inside. The voices of being a victim and perpetrator to yourself are conditioned responses for survival. In other words they are functions, not identity. You, your identity as consciousness, just has to see this function and it will automatically adjust in the light of your True Self that is indeed the energy of Love and Truth. Because your being is infinite Consciousness, there can be no arrival at a destination, only an expansion of awareness to encompass more and more into your Being

Consider Consciousness as a vast ocean. The waves are the surface movement that rise and recede - every individual life, just a movement of arising and falling back into the ocean. Every experience, just a wave cresting and waning. Every wave the same and unique in its short life. Just consciousness taking a unique, very short form. Allow the waves of experience to rise and fall within the vastness of the ocean that you are. Just see and name the experience, the dynamic - self-reflection. There is nothing more to do. Just see and know.

“Allow the wave of experience to rest in the ocean of your consciousness, through awareness” ~Lyndall Johnson

The defenses of “Tired,” and “Work”

Think of how often you use the word “tired” as an excuse to not pay attention, self reflect, look inside. Consider how you use, “busy and so much to do,” as an excuse to not self reflect, look inside and pay attention to your inner work. Self-reflection does not take energy or take you away from your work. It is just staying awake and attentive when you are tired or busy. Are you living your purpose to get aware and wake up to who you truly are? Or are you too tired and too busy to live your purpose? Next time just notice yourself use these words to excuse yourself from seeing the layers under the defense. What are you avoiding and running from internally?

Expansion in Awareness

Expanding your awareness will bring you to the edge of discomfort. ~Charisse Lyons

Does the world’s outer expansion correlate with inner expansion? If not we will destroy the world. Space travel is irrelevant if it does not match inner expansion.

Consider the motives of recent increased interest in the moon and Mars.

Every expansion of the cervix brings the mother closer to birthing the infant but it hurts and requires courage, co-operation, intention and perseverance.

The birth of consciousness does not come without pain but you make it a lot worse when you refuse to name and see and know your experience, and instead resist and complain and attack when you are invited to see, name, and know your experience and dynamic. You also need to be able to swallow your pride, to do this work. Birth is messy and there is no room in the labor room for false pride.

Christ’s birth is always happening, and yet, if it doesn’t happen to me, how can it help me?

Everything depends on that.

There is only one birth -

and this birth takes place in the being

and in the ground

and core of the soul...

Not only is the Son of the heavenly Creator

born in this darkness -

but you too are born there

as a child of the same heavenly Creator

and none other.

And the Creator extends this same power to you

out of the divine maternity bed

located in the Godhead to eternally give birth ...

The fruitful person gives birth

out of the very same foundation

from which the Creator begets the eternal Word.

It is from this core that one becomes fruitfully pregnant.

~Meister Eckhart

HUMILITY

She asked me

To write

Something on humility

But if there is no me

then what is there to write?

Perhaps

humility is the absence of pride

And perhaps pride is the part of me that says

“I know,” because to not know is shameful

“I am right,” because to not be right is so badly wrong

“I have the answers,” because to not have an answer means I am stupid

“I can tell you what to do,” because this makes me powerful instead of impotent

“Pay attention to me,” so I do not feel inconsequential

“Love me,” because I think I am unlovable

“Respect me,” because if you don’t I do not think of myself as respectable,

“Notice me,” because I feel so invisible,

“Listen to me,” because I do not believe I have anything to say

Take care of me, because if you don’t I might die of my sensitivities

“I can,” because I am so fearful that I cannot

“Let me tell you how important I am,” because I think I have no value

“I’m so terrible and bad,” - so you don’t tell me this first

“I don’t deserve you,” so you tell me I do

“I didn’t do anything,” - I’m so glad you noticed

“Look how much I give,” because I think I am selfish

“You are, Oh,  so, selfish - look how giving I am”

“I will do this perfectly,” because I think I am flawed

“Look how good I am,” because I think I’m bad

“Look how much I do, “ because I fear that I may be irresponsible and lazy

“Look how much I have,” because then maybe I am successful

“Look where all I’ve traveled,” perhaps this will make me someone

“I’m better than ...” because I think I am less than ...

“Look how much I suffer,” because I think no-one cares

I’m so mad at you,” - please don’t be mad at me

“Those people are wrong,” so that I can feel right, (but maybe I’m not)

“Those people are bad,” so that I can feel good (but maybe I’m not)

“Those people,” are ignorant, so that I can feel all knowing (but maybe I’m not)

“Those people are are inferior,” so that I can feel superior (but maybe I’m not)

“Those people are evil,” so that I can feel righteous (but maybe I’m not)

“You are, Oh, so wrong,” because if you are not then maybe I am.

I will not apologize, because I have justified my wrongdoing

“I can’t believe you did that, because I never would”

“Look how much I suffer, no-one cares about me”

“My kids are so great,” which means I am too

“I have all this education,” aren’t you impressed?

“I make all this money,” aren’t you impressed?

“I give all this money to the poor,” aren’t you impressed?

Please be so impressed because I do not think I am impressive at all.

If I

cease to be

worthless

then

what is there to say?

© Lyndall Johnson March 2003

For Photographers

“I don’t know about other people’s cameras. Mine is a thing I had cobbled up; it holds together with tape and is always losing parts. All I need to set is the distance and that other thing – what do you call that other thing? I’m not a fan of mechanics. I have had this camera, still the same one since I started taking photos. It has lived with me, shared many moments of my existence, both good and bad. If I ever lost it… well, the very idea of having to live without it pulls at my heart.

(What kind of painting did you do?) I started with earth, which I mixed with other materials, such as leaves, I’m not even sure I should call it painting. After that I tried canvas and real colors. Then I destroyed everything. Later, I wrote poetry, which I also destroyed. Finally, I discovered photography and realized that it allowed me to produce something more powerful. Of course, it cannot create, nor express all we want to express. But it can be a witness of our passage on earth, like a notebook.

To be sure the landscape can’t run away, and yet I always fear that it may...I must set up my tripod, so I worry that the landscape may disappear the next second and I don’t stop keeping an eye on it while I get prepared. Then, when pressing the shutter, I hold my breath. These moments are the greatest joys in my life, as if I were undressing the most beautiful woman in the world – that is, if she will allow herself to be undressed. If the photo is a success, it means that she was willing. If not, it has been a lovely dream.

A photo isn’t only what you see, but also what your imagination adds to it. My own imagination may add something else, a third person’s something else again. But does it matter? What matters is the contact between us, the fact that we talk about trees losing their leaves, about objects we crush underfoot without realizing it, about that house dying gently, abandoned by its owner, even though it’s the house where he was born, where he learnt to cry and to laugh.”

~Mario Giacomelli (1925-2000)